Sinnya Nakamura

though the cascade of failures remained unchanged, I began to notice that certain things I once struggled with were showing signs of slight improvement.

First and foremost, I would like to express my heartfelt gratitude to Daigu Oshō, the monks-in-training, and everyone connected to Fukugonji Temple for granting me such a precious opportunity.

With my own sense of resolve, I joined this five-night, six-day temple stay, but what I experienced far exceeded anything I could have imagined—it was an incredibly rich and intense period of time.

At first, I was bewildered by the unfamiliar customs and environment. I found myself overwhelmed, merely trying to keep up with the tasks assigned to me as time pressed on.

Through this experience, I learned the importance—and the challenge—of letting go of the ego, focusing wholeheartedly on the task at hand, and harmonizing with fellow participants, supporting one another rather than acting solely on personal intentions.

Chanting, etiquette, posture, responses, walking, listening, eye contact, and maintaining focus—so many aspects of my own conduct that I had never consciously paid attention to required precise, swift, and mindful execution. Though demanding, this fostered within me a new sensitivity and awareness.

In the beginning, nothing seemed to go well. I repeated mistakes, my mind was in disarray, my body cried out in exhaustion, and I felt as though I was at the edge of losing the balance between heart and body. Yet it was at such moments that I received a golden teaching: “It is precisely when you feel driven into a corner that you must remain composed and regulate yourself.” Those words deeply resonated with me.

From that point on, though the cascade of failures remained unchanged, I began to notice that certain things I once struggled with were showing signs of slight improvement.

By concentrating on the present moment, I began to understand—if only a little—that these moments, when stacked together, shape a positive past and lead us toward a more skillful future.

I still lack polish and remain far from any mastery, and I have yet to fully grasp my focus or direction. But I hope to continue expanding this circle of mindfulness little by little in my everyday life.

During this temple stay, I was so absorbed in managing myself that I fell short in extending kindness, consideration, and proper communication to my fellow practitioners who shared the same aspirations. I reflect deeply on this and intend to be more mindful in my daily interactions from now on.

Having completed these six days of training, I now understand that the real practice begins as I return to daily life. With a renewed heart, I will carry the spirit of this experience into my life with my family and workplace.

I still vividly remember the moment after the morning service, when I stood before the main hall and watched the morning sun rise through the mist—it was truly a soul-cleansing sight that filled me with renewed energy and hope. Going forward, I hope to become someone who can shine light upon those around me, just like that morning sun, living each day while remembering the days of training.

Thank you very much from the bottom of my heart.

May I cultivate compassion, wisdom, and Buddha-nature; may my body and mind grow steadfast; and may I light a corner of the world with the great clarity of Daigu.

Gasshō.